Define Self Trust

I’m sensing a theme in the first few episodes of the Podcast…last post was on Self Awareness and the next one is actually on Self Acceptance. If you haven’t listened to Michelle’s episode I highly recommend it.

What is Self-Trust and Why Do I Care?

Self-trust is an important facet of self-acceptance. Cynthia Wall, author of The Courage to Trust: A Guide To Building Deep And Lasting Relationships, say this about the trait:

“Self-trust means that you can take care of your needs and safety. It means you trust yourself to survive situations, and practice kindness, not perfection. It means you refuse to give up on yourself”.

Self-trust means that you can take care of your needs and safety. It means you trust yourself to survive situations, and practice kindness, not perfection. It means you refuse to give up on yourself.

cynthia wall

With that kind of definition I don’t know how you can’t care. The ability to continually invest and show kindness to yourself it really difficult, especially as we try to become more self aware.

How to Develop Self-Trust

  1. Speak Kindly to Yourself – This doesn’t mean that we don’t need to be critical of what we’re doing and why, it means we need to have compassion on ourselves when we fall short of where we want to be.
  2. Know Your Emotions Are Important – All of them. Understand why they’re there and don’t just shove them down. This one in particular has been difficult for me (I would rather be a robot than have to deal with feelings most of the time) but the more I’ve tried to understand what has caused an emotional reaction the easier it is for me to address.
  3. Ask How You’re Doing – Michelle mentions in her interview that she had to set a timer to check in with herself every 15 minutes when she started trying to narrow down if she was doing something she actually wanted to or not. This takes time, setting a timer is a great way to start practicing.
  4. Boundaries – Setting boundaries, and knowing you’re setting the right ones, is key. If you trust that you’re doing the right thing it’s easier to do. If you have no idea on how to get started I HIGHLY recommend reading Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend. I read this during the divorce process and it made that whole experience so much easier.

Is there anything else that you recommend to help develop self-trust?

Published by Kaili Speaks

As the podcast host of Define, Kaili has the opportunity to chat with people about their defining moment and what they learned from it. In two-part episodes she dives into personal stories and then into the behavioral science and the logistics of how to use those traits and experiences to help us see each other in a different light. If you are wanting to learn more about what defines the people around you, tune in and learn more about how to apply these traits into your own life. 

One thought on “Define Self Trust

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: